How Am I Doing?

Canon T2i, EF 17-40mm f/4L USM lens, Aperture Priority, f/11, 1/500sec, ISO 400, exposure bias 0step, focal length 30mm, cropped, evaluative metering

If the question is for my blog, probably not so good. I can’t help but feeling guilty that I have not been posting good contents lately and translating Thai ghost story that I love to read so much. As you can see that the offering bowl is not complete, it’s lacking water which I sometimes forget to offer at the temple. A reminder to self, I will work on translating a ghost story.

14 thoughts on “How Am I Doing?

  1. Nye,

    Why is sometimes hard to comment on your posts? Do you turn off the comments? I tried to comment on “How Am I Doing?” today, but could not.

    I am the same as you; I’m not posting much, either. Part of it is that I am so depressed missing Aon and the boys that I lose interest in most things creative. The rest of the time is trying to sell more books, which takes up so much time, and sadly, very few sales to report.

    • Jeffrey, I’ve moved your comment to this post. I think WP is having problem with comment, I sometimes have problem commenting on other WP blogger’s post also.

      It’s so hard when you live so far from your family, hopefully you will be able to stay home and write, that would be wonderful.

      As for me I have to work long hours and so emotionally drained from my work. It will be like this for a while before it gets better.

      • Dear Nye,
        You are still the best!
        Thank so much for this blog, I enjoy it very much.
        As for the offering bowl, as long as you have a good intention then you are good!
        May all sentient beings receive the benefit from it.
        San

        • Thanks San for your kind words, it’s good to hear from you. I’ll keep in mind about the good intention, how it’s received is a different story. 🙂

          I guess it’s summer time and we spend more time outdoor than surfing the Internet, I envious those that could surf during their working hours.

  2. I agree, no matter if there’s a update or not you’re still the best.
    I enjoy seeing the beauty of nature and cultural that you have in your blog.
    In addition, I do miss your ghost stories. I enjoy reading it even though I’m a scary cat, Lol.
    Thank you! 🙂

    • Thanks Lala, I missed translating the ghost story also, I read one that I liked and I’m working on translating it right now.

      My sister was telling me several days ago that she drove passed this cemetery at 5:30 am on Monday and saw a lady in a white dress standing next to an old style bicycle. The lady looked at my sister when she passed her. My sister thought it was strange that the lady was there by herself and she couldn’t have come out to exercise since she was wearing a white dress and her bicycle looked like it was from the 60s. When she got to work she asked one of her co-workers if she saw the lady when she passed the cemetery (they took the same route). Her co-worker said no, there were no one there. She then said, what you saw was not a human but a ghost, no one would be standing there at that hour. I kind of felt the same way, I passed the cemetery numerous times and have never seen anyone there. I guess I’m not as lucky as her, although this is not her first time seeing something like this. 🙂

      • Yah! Another ghost story to spoil me. That is so freaky! I think that if it was me that saw that instead I would get goosebumps all over my body because it’ll be obvious that is not a human-being. Scary. Speaking of it, that reminds me of a story that my friend father experienced. The neighborhood that my friend and I grew up (we live a couple house away from each other) have a big church so when her father would drive home late from work he world usually drive pass the church. So one night when it was about 1AM in the morning, he drove pass the church and saw a lady wearing a long white dress floating around the sidewalk. Right then he knew that what he saw was not human-being and quickly speed home. After that event he became sick for awhile because he was taken back by what he saw. I don’t know if other people who live around there sees anything, but as far as I know or seen me or either my family had not seen anything so he must be the fortunate one to see it.

        • Lala, when my second sister told me I had goosebumps. I asked her if she felt anything and she said she thought it was a lady. I think I would have freaked out if I saw someone floating. People would put wreath a long side of the road and it’s where someone died of a car wreck but I’ve never seen anything when I drove pass by. I actually look for them at night and see nothing unusual. One time it was dark and foggy near the wreck where 2 people died.I wanted to stop the car to take picture, but I was by myself and didn’t dare. I think it would have looked so pretty. 🙂

          My second sister also saw something inside her house that she was not sure. I blogged about it a while back. This happened several days before my mom passed away, she died of liver cancer in Jan. 2007. My second sister helped my mom with her breakfast and gave her medication as usual. After her meal my mom decided to take a nap, so my second sister decided to clean around the house, and the bathroom, which was one door down from my mom’s bedroom. As she was wiping the mirror, she heard the front door opened then closed. In the back of her mind she thought it was my dad and I came back from the doctor’s visit. She called out to my youngest sister who came to visit from NYC, she was sitting in the living room (right across from the front door) to see if it were us that came home. My youngest sister was nursing her baby at the time and couldn’t get up, but also heard someone coming through the front door and just assumed that it was my dad. Shortly after that my second sister saw a reflection in the mirror of someone walking passed her, and went into my mom’s bedroom. That person had a blanket over his/her head and draped down both sides covering the shoulders. The blanket was somewhat brownish in color, very similar to my mom’s blanket. It happened so fast that my second sister immediately followed that person into the room, my mom was still awake and my sister asked if she was okay, which she nodded her head then slowly closed her eyes. My second sister searched the entire room, even looked in the closets, and under the bed but couldn’t find that person. She came out to get my nephew and youngest sister and told them that someone was in the house. The three once again searched my mom’s bedroom, then the entire house but there was no trace of that person. All were baffled because both of my sisters heard someone opening the front door and my second sister saw that person walk pass by.

          Shortly after that my youngest sister went to dry some clothes and the dryer was located in the hallway next to the bathroom. She had her baby in a carrier backpack, and as she was putting wet cloths into the dryer, her baby started to giggling as if someone were playing with her. I find this hard to believe because she was not a very friendly baby and I can’t even look at her without her crying, and for her to giggling is like a miracle. My youngest sister said that she could feel someone’s presence. Who ever it was is not a bad person because s/he was not scaring the baby, but not being able to see gave her goosebumps, so she rushed with what she was doing and went back to the living room.

          My second sister was still puzzled, and kept thinking of what just happened. She went back to the bathroom and started to wipe the mirror again. She could see the hallway and her bedroom door from the reflection of the mirror. As she was wiping, she saw that person again but this time in front of her bedroom door, and was waking toward the front door. My sister took off running after that person, but there was no one there. She couldn’t figure out which direction that person went because my youngest sister was sitting in the living room and didn’t see anyone. They checked the front door and it was locked.

          My dad and I came home approximately 2 hours later. I went straight into my mom’s bedroom and thought she looked different, somewhat grayish in color. I noticed that both my sisters gave me this eerie look, as if they wanted to tell me something. They later told me about the morning incident. My second sister told me that several days back, she saw a huge black night owl sitting on top of the roof rack of my Rav4 but didn’t dare tell me about it because she was afraid that it would freak me out. It made me feel uneasy at the time because I knew that Laotian believe that a black nigh owl, Nok Khao comes with Pee Pie (ghost) and it was a sign of omen. In most cases someone will die, and that someone we all knew that it was my mom, but we didn’t have the time frame as to when and in most cases only 3 days. My mom passed away 11 days later.

          Until this day we still don’t know who that person was, I often wonder if it was my mom’s spirit, which Lao/Thai people called it ‘Kwon Dip’ and one of the monks in Charlotte Temple seems to agree with us. I think we were happy with this conclusion, but then another monk with a higher ranking told us that it could be many things. It could be a sign that it’s almost her time, it could be a messenger that was delivering a message to us, or a person that came to pick her up. Who ever that person was, we’ve not seen him/her again after my mom passed away. Shortly after my mom died, my second sister often felt like someone was watching her. She would see but when she looked up there was no one there. Her and my dad live at the house that my mom passed away.

          Lee and I visit them every weekend and I’ve never seen anything. Occasionally the TV would make loud buzz noises when Lee’s watching and my second sister said that it only happened when Lee was there.

          • Nye, oh! yes I would definitely freak out as well. I think that if it was me instead I would seriously freeze right there and not know what to do.

            Oh, wow that is so spooky and scary. I definitely agree, especially when a baby who is not friendly and was to laugh I would definitely think that something/someone is playing with the baby. Especially the fact that babies can see what we can’t see. In addition, I think that their sister is one brave woman. I would never have the guts to go after that person or even check because I’ll definitely run and hide under a blanket or get some help. Talking about it gives me goosebumps. However, I am sorry for your lost and believe that your mom is always watching after each one of you. I don’t know if people experience what your sister experienced often, but a aunt of mine experienced that as well. My cousin told me that days before her grandma was going to pass away, her mom and her younger brother was home babysitting her older sister kids. During that time, her mom was in the kitchen and her younger brother was in the living room watching TV with the kids when they heard someone used a key to open the front door and came inside by hearing a door shut. Her younger brother then thought that it was the older sister who came back to pick up her kids since she also had a spare key to their house but when he stood up to look there was no body because usually when the sister comes she’ll announce her arrival to grab her kids attention, but there was silence. He then went into the kitchen and asked his mom if she saw body in case if the sister went to use the bathroom but she too didn’t see anyone came in. Both of them then were spooked off by that weird incident. That following weekend, they started to smell this really bad odor that smells like rotten meat in their basement. They tried to figure what was causing the smell but didn’t find anything or see anything. At that moment, her mom kind of knew that it was probably the other world doing so she then harshly yelled that if whoever was causing that smell need to stop it because that was not a right place to cause or stir problem. After those two incidents her grandma then passed away a couple days later. What they learned after their grandma pass was that those two incident was giving them a sign that their grandma was going to leave them soon so that is why they experienced those incident. Therefore, I believe that for your sisters experience at that time it was giving a sign to your family especially with the door, figure, and owl incident.

            P.S – Sorry for spamming this post, it just interest and make me crave for me, Hehehe. 😉

            • Lala, thanks. It’s no spamming at all, I enjoy reading your comments and stories. As for me it’s easier to talk about my mom now than when it first happened. Your cousin story is very much like my sister’s story. It’s definitely something there that we can’t explain.

              My GI Joe sister had a visit from my mom not long after she passed away. My mom’s monument is at one of the temples in the US and she went to help hang the draperies at the temple. She thought she smelled a foul odor, but didn’t pay attention and continued to work as fast as she could since it was getting dark. My GI Joe is afraid of ghost, and afraid to go into my mom’s room by herself after she passed away. Anyway, continue with the story, there were many people at the temple including monks. This was late in the evening and one of the monks came over and told her that her mom came to visit her. She was standing outside the door smiling at her. You could imagine how my GI Joe sister must have felt. She almost fell off the ladder. She looked at the door but couldn’t see anything. I guess some are more lucky than others.

              I finally finished translating a ghost story, hope to do this on a regular basis from now on. 🙂

  3. I definitely know how you feel as well. Its hard, but just knowing that they are always there watching after you makes you feel safe and happy. I agree, some are more lucky than others. I would of felt the same way as your sister, but just to see that person would makes you feel a lot better. For an example, my family and my aunts (My dad sisters) wants to see our grandma, but we never do. However, a aunt of mine (My dad’s younger brother wife) always see my grandma but she is really scare to see my grandma. Therefore, that is why I also believe that some are more lucky than others, but in my culture belief they believe that the weak souls see more often than the stronger souls so that’s why my aunt (My dad’s younger brother wife) see my grandma more often because she have weaker souls than us. Crazy and confusing, Hehehe. Thank you for the new update, going on my way right now to read it! 🙂

    • Lala, I was brought up to believe that weak soul see the ghost also. I guess it’s like those that have six senses. It depends on how you look at it, we think it’s a gift and they might think it’s a curse. I take that curse any day, I could write my own ghost story. 🙂

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