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A friend is one before whom I may think aloud.
All our progress is an unfolding, like a vegetable bud. You have first an instinct, then an opinion, then a knowledge as the plant has root, bud, and fruit. Trust the instinct to the end, though you can render no reason.
As we grow old…the beauty steals inward.
Character is higher than intellect… A great soul will be strong to live, as well as to think.
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
Don’t be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.
Don’t waste yourself in rejection, nor bark against the bad, but chant the beauty of the good.
Every great and commanding moment in the annals of the world is the triumph of some enthusiasm.
None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone.
If I have lost confidence in myself, I have the universe against me.
People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of their character.
Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.
Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.
The world belongs to the energetic.
Have you ever wonder as to why we don’t know the people that we want to know, and those that we know is not exactly what we thought they are, might be because of how we perceived them.
I once heard a story, there was an elderly lady talking to a child. She has a coin in her hand and asked if the child wants to know what it was, if yes, then to knock on the table 5 times, the child did as told. She then opened her hand and there sat an ordinary coin. After that, she closed her hand into a fist, and asked the same question again. But this time, the child lost interest and really did not want to know, the truth is, the child knew that in that hand was just an ordinary coin and there was nothing special about it.
I guess it’s only human nature to want to know, to have and to hold, and we would do almost anything to find out, to get to know but once we know what it was, we then lost interest. If I was to ask you, have the coin change, is it less in value? The answer is no, the value of the coin is still the same because it’s still the same coin even before and after we saw it. It’s the feeling of wanting to know, the feeling that we can’t reach, the feeling that we can’t have that is making something valuable, but once we know what it is, we no longer see the importance of it.
As for certain individual that we thought highly of because s/he is popular, everyone want to get to know, want to be closed to, but once we engaged in conversation, we know right away that there is nothing special about that person, sometimes thing is not what it seems. This holds true for many celebrities, everyone want to get to know them because they look good, have a sense of humor, but once you have a chance to sit down and have a hart to hart talk, there is nothing special about that person, they are very ordinary, they can’t think for themselves but arrogant, those feelings that you have at the very beginning sort of vanished, you no longer want to know them.
The person that I thought is interesting and would love to meet in person is Vannasone Joy Keodara of VOA, Lao Diaspora Voice of America, I heard her voice all the time from listening to her news broadcasting, and I am impressed with her profile that I read from Lao Roots Magazine in their Third Issue.
From her interview, her job description: My primary duties include reporting live news and current affairs around the globe, translating the news from English to Laotian to be broadcast, creating digital files and maintaining the website. I am in charge of a weekly Lao Diaspora and a few music programs, which feature overseas current affairs and entertainment. In addition, I cover field interviews with various news conferences and briefings. I also maintain and handle all aspects of the technology information for Lao Service.
Interesting as to how she ends up working there: I heard about VOA since I was little, but never thought that I would end up working there. I came to D.C. in 2003 for the US-ASEAN Film and Photography Festival for my documentary film The Leaf, Not Yet Falling. While I was here, I learned about the Laotian community and before I knew it, I was already working for VOA-Lao Service.
I love all aspects of it: doing live news, the fast pace life, meeting datelines, and most importantly building my network between Laotians and other groups. I love exploring and challenging. Sometimes I get to travel and which allows me to meet important people.
I enjoy being able to learn about the current affairs of my own communities, as well as others around the globe. I guess people respect my job, my title, and sometimes I get freebies. What is also different now is that people recognize me more.
Buddhism makes us understand our own character. Hence, if we can understand our own mind and recognize our own weaknesses then we can easily train it. This is the only way to gain peace and happiness. The Buddha taught us how to analyze our mind so that we can understand where our defilements lie and why disturbances arise to pollute the mind.
The Buddha was such a practical teacher that he just did not stop there. He went on to the next stage and showed us how to change that mental attitude. If our minds are conditioned to be hot-tempered, selfish, greedy, jealous, and cruel, the Buddha taught us different methods to train such minds. He said that ‘mind is the forerunner of all mental states.’
Whatever we do, it all begins in the mind. This reminds us of the well known principle embodied in the preamble to the UNESCO Charter on Human Rights which states: ‘Since wars begin in the minds of men, it is in the minds of men that the defenses of peace can be constructed.’ So if we stop evil thoughts from arising in the mind we will be capable of only doing good. This is the way to practice Buddhism. But many people have generally tended to ignore all the important aspects of the Buddha’s teaching and have instead concentrated more on the ritualistic aspects, thereby looking for an easy way out of suffering. In Buddhism, we cannot gain salvation by simply pleasing or praising the gods without training the mind.
Then there is the Supreme Wisdom. Wisdom here is not simple academic or scientific knowledge. We can gather vast book knowledge through learning but that in itself does not bring wisdom. Wisdom cannot appear in the mind as long as selfishness, hatred, and delusion predominate. It is only when these mental hindrances are completely erased from the mind and replaced with mental development that real wisdom will appear.
I’ve met many nice, interesting and funny people when I started blogging and came across many not so nice ones. As you can see, my English is not perfect because it’s not my first language, more like my third, but most of my readers are very forgiving, and one of the reasons that I blog is to improve my English, as for some of you reading this might say I’m writing Engrish, as one of my readers was kind enough to point this out to me.
When I was growing up, I was taught to follow the golden rule, of course, my parents didn’t teach me in this order nor we had to sing the song of the golden rule, but the concept was the same; the song of the golden rule by C. Albers goes ,
“Do unto others as you wish
That they should do to you.
Then would this earth a heaven be
So beautiful and true.
Be kinds to those who are unkind
Give love to those who hate;
Thus will your merit be untold,
Your blessings very great.
Give unto all the best you have
To all a favour do,
And all those blessings in their time
Will then come back to you.”
Sometimes I find it hard to follow this simple rule, even citing it wrong at times, and changed it to “Do unto others as they had done to us…” which at the end only lead to hatred and never ending battle war of words. I knew in the past that I wrote a lot of stuff that offended people, but that’s a personal opinion, and I believe that one should be allowed to express his/her opinion on his/her personal blog.
The saying goes that an apple a day keeps the doctor away might not be true anymore, but now it’s a laugh every day keeps the heart attack away.
From China Daily newspaper reported that Fudan University’s psychological consultancy center, has set up a Heartfelt Laughing Club. The center will hold training sessions for students to cope with stress and depression.
This is very interesting; I do have to admit that stress can take its toll if you don’t take care of yourself, such as exercise and eating right, but according to this, laughing also helps. I read once in a Thai Magazine that young people in China are so busy trying to make a living that they’ve forgotten the simple things in life, such as smile or laughter. They believe that being successful in their career will bring them true happiness, which they’re not totally wrong in this respect, but having to work, work, work, can lead to a very stressful life.
Photo originally uploaded by: tcnineteen
The reasoning behind friendship for most of us is that sometimes it just happens, but at certain times, it’d seem like crossroads that two people would never meet again. I often ask myself as to why it’s this way, just like at certain time that I’d meet someone that’s really nice, but yet afraid to approach or get to know that person, might be that I’m afraid that they might think that I need something from them.
I guess it’s from my own personal experiences and looking from my own prospective that most that approached me because they want something from me, such as wanting me to do something for them, not truly want to be my friend, and once they get what they want and have no need for me anymore, then it’s the end of that friendship, this type of friendship is with condition and I seem to have a lot of that lately. As for this reasoning, I’m very cautious in approaching people, especially if they made it known to everyone how successful they’re as an individual, afraid that they might think that I need something from them.
I think life has its up and down, and very normal for some of us to feel stress at times, I know it’s very normal for me, might be that I’ve to deal with people at all times, day in day out. If stress is so normal, why do I feel so bad? How can I deal with stress? Some might take it out on their friends, co-workers, pets, or family members, but I happen to take it out on my blog. Sometimes my feeling dictates what I write, if it made you feel bad or sad after reading it, don’t be because feeling such as this pass, and can be replaced with feeling of happiness.
One of the good things that came out from this post was that I had a nice quiet day yesterday, might be that people were afraid to approach me. I had time to think about some of the issues that have been bothering me for quiet sometime, I can’t say that I’ve solutions to them, but at least I’m thinking about them.
I once read, awhile back that we can change bad situation into good just by our way of thinking. Silly, but after thinking about it, its all about feeling most of the time and the example that I’ll be using here is, if I lost my wallet.
Happy, sad, success, and failure…disappointment…I’m sure we all feel this way at one time or another. At certain times, it might feel like eternity, especially if we’re in a bad situation, as Lao people would say, darkness in eight corners, why eight corners, I’m not sure as to why, but I’m thinking that it should only be four since a room only has four corners (walls), but basically, it means that there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. [Edit: per my co-worker, a room has 4 corners, plus 4 more corners from the ceiling which explains as to why a room has 8 corners]
However, while we’re there, there are good things that came out from a bad situation, hard to believe, but I had been there many times myself, and these are the things that I’ve discovered,
- It made me stronger.
- It made me realize the value of happiness that it’s priceless.
- It tests my ability, placed me in a situation that I had never thought possible.
- It made me do things that I might not have done, such as to alleviate my suffering.
- It gave me the ability to problem solving, like anything else, practice makes perfect.
- It made me more patient.
- It taught me to be careful, not to be too trusty.
- It taught me to see the world at a different light, that it’s a lot bigger than I thought.
- It helps me to see who my true friends are.
- It lets me know who really care for me, and love me.
- It lets me know who will help me in my time of need.
- It made me aware of the ability of my friends, and me.
- It made me aware of the true meaning of laughter, that it’s very important in my life.
- It forced me to see the world in a positive light that anything is possible but first I have to conquer and overcome my obstacle.
The key is positive thinking, “Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same.” ~Francesca Reigler
Many times we communicate with words but not always, there is a Lao/Thai saying that ‘Ta Phen Nathang Kong Houh Jai’ (eyes are the windows of the heart (soul)), I guess it meant that you can tell what the person is thinking or feeling by looking into their eyes. I’m not sure how this phrase came about, I sometime wonder if it has anything to do with the White Tara (Tibetan Buddhist), Goddess of Compassion, the Divine Mother; she has seven eyes, the two usual ones, one in the middle of her forehead and 2 eyes in the palms of her hands and 2 in the soles of her feet. This symbolizes that all of her activities are done with omniscient awareness. She is said to bring health and prolong life. Operating from the space of this compassionate love generates a long and fulfilling life.
Our eyes also allow us to see the beauty of this world, and what we express through our eyes might be the reflection of what we saw. Then, what about the blind, I once read that they have eyes in their fingers. What if the person has no facial expression, I guess then you have to be a mind reader. To add on to this eyes theory, I think a smile expresses those eyes; then one can say that ‘a smile’ is the window to the heart (soul). You would have thought that a smile is an expression of happiness feeling only, but have you ever noticed that sometimes someone’s smile might be very dry or sad. So a smile varies in feelings and emotions; might be feeling of happiness, sadness, awkwardness, embarrassment, worry, hatred, or even insulting at time (Did I miss any?) I think you could tell how that person is feeling by looking at the shape of that person’s lips and their facial expression, mainly the eyes. I sometimes wonder when I see the smiley emotional icon that people typed, what types of smile (feeling) they’ve at the time. Is it really a happy smile that I’ve often perceived? 
This is an interesting article posted on June 11, 2007 at msnbc.msn.com, which is related to my posts of The Joy Of Being By Myself, and Only The Lonely; original source here.
CHICAGO - People who are often stressed out or depressed are far more likely to develop memory problems than those with sunnier dispositions, U.S. researchers said on Monday in a finding that sheds light on early predictors of Alzheimer’s disease.
They said those who most often are anxious or depressed were 40 times more likely to develop mild cognitive impairment, a form of memory loss that is often a transitional stage between normal aging and dementia.
“Not only are these individuals losing cognition, but they are showing many of the changes in the brain that are associated with Alzheimer’s disease,” said Robert Wilson of Rush University Medical Center in Chicago.
Since I’m a loner, being by myself, and doing things that I like is welcoming, but for others, there might not be much joy of being by him/herself as my previous post have suggested. It might even sound ridiculous to some after reading it, especially those individual that gets easily bored with him/herself. The feeling of boredom or loneliness, if left untreated for a long period might not be very healthy, as one of my blogger friends described his situation as, “…And if you feel that you do not enjoy things as much as you used to - or experiencing this kind of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) symptoms for no apparent reason…”, to me that’s a feeling of loneliness, I sometimes worry about him, and I’d imagine that the feeling of loneliness sorts of creeping in little by little, and before you know it, it’s there full-blown and it’s literally taken control of your life, for you’ve no energy to do things, and depression hurts, it hurts you physically and it hurts people around you emotionally. I never thought that I’d be writing about this topic, for I’ve never felt this way before. If I’m bored, I always manage to find things to do, such as reading.
I think sometimes it feels good to be a bit lonely, it’s a nostalgia feeling, which I often turn on sentimental music, and let my mind wandering off to a place far away, and often times I’d revisit my childhood memory that I stashed away for a day such as this. The feeling that I get is sort of warm and fuzzy inside, it always brings a smile to my face, and I know that I’m not the only one that feel this way, there’re many out there that share my feeling. I often welcome this type of loneliness, and I’d say that it’s nice to be in my own little world. For some this might not be a good thing because being lonely might not bring the feeling of nostalgia, but more of a depression and the best thing to do is to get rid of this feeling of boredom. There are several good tips in Kwanruen Magazine written in Thai language as to how to get rid of your boredom, see which ones suit you best.
I think it’d be lonely to live like a hermit, but sometimes with so much chaotic in today society, I just want to get away from it all and be by myself. Being alone in the sense, you don’t have to feel lonely, a bit confusing you’d say. How often do you spend time with yourself, thinking about you, and not about someone else, your answer is probably not so much different from mine, and sadly, I don’t do that often enough. My mind is often cluttered with things that I’ve to do for others, dead lines that I’ve to meet, people that I often have to encounter, and some that I hardly have time for anymore, which all lead to stress at the end. Do you sometimes feel like you want to get away, to go somewhere far away, that you need a vacation, if yes, that might be a sign that you need to spend more time with yourself because you might have done too much for others, and have forgotten about yourself.
I find that the best solution is to get away from people and spend more time with nature, spend more time with myself, surprisingly I can find many solutions to my problems by doing this, but at the end, I often get bored with myself, and ready to come back to my old life that I just walked away from, but this time I have solutions to my problems and ready to come back as myself once again; socializing with my same circle of friends.
It’s time to reflect, time for a new beginning, even for the Thai political arena, the court dissolved the party and banned Thaksin from politics for five years. Below are from Manager online written in Thai language and it read, “we’ve to thank ITV, because as soon as the verdict came out, the camera was capturing the night sky; what we saw was the dark cloud moving passed the full moon; that signify the bright future ahead, which was shielded by the dark shadow of evilness all these years.” I couldn’t have said it better myself, that was beautiful.
ต้องขอบคุณสถานีโทรทัศน์ทีไอทีวี ที่ทันทีที่ตุลาการรัฐธรรมนูญ อ่านคำวินิจฉัยให้ยุบพรรคไทยรักไทย กล้องของทีไอทีวีจับภาพไปบนท้องฟ้า เป็นภาพของเมฆดำที่เคลื่อนออกจากเงาของดวงจันทร์ เปรียบเหมือนความสว่างไสวที่ถูกเงามืดบดบังกำลังกลับคืนมา และความชั่วร้ายกำลังมลายไป
It has been 1 week since we launched the new Lao Planet – Lao Voices Online, so far we have 6 contributors which are DJ, Ginger, Padek, Salat, Sim, and Vienne, and out of these 6 are 3 active authors, I’m one of the authors, writing by the name of Ginger, Darly as DJ, and Padek (fermented fish or anchovies, some might say that the name fits him well, I think he might have earned this name from the old LP forum, who would have thought that he’d pick this name for himself), but don’t let the name Padek intimidates you because he is actually a very nice guy. The new Lao Planet has once again stood proudly, the sun always shines after the rain; I think Darly has done a superb job and handled the situation extremely well. I’m hoping that our old members wouldn’t be too shy and would decide to join us as contributors, remember that ‘Our Voice Must Be Heard’, don’t let a little shyness prevent you from expressing your voice, Lao Planet’s door is always open for you to voice your opinion.
I feel for those that are color blind, their world is literally black and white but definitely not by choice. I’m thankful to be able to see in colors, the world is such a beautiful place, but sadly, some of us are still mentally seeing things in black and white. I was once guilty of this myself, I had the tendency to see things in black and white, but I’ve gotten a lot better because seeing things in black and white only lead to many disappointments in life. Still, there are many people out there that are still seeing things in black and white, and if they ask you a question, they’d expect a yes or no type of answer, but in reality, it’s not like that. Seriously, look around you, the world is not in black and white, life is full of colors, and answer various according to our mood at the time, today my answer might be a yes, and tomorrow I might feel differently about the same issue.
Many times, when we’ve a problem, we’ve the tendency to see the problem in black and white, and it’s frustrating because we might not be able to resolve that problem with just a plain black and white answer. If I’ve a problem, I like to look at it from a different angle, from another person’s point of view, and many times, I’d ask another person for their opinion, such as friends or family for advice. I’m not one to be ashamed to ask for help, that’s what friends and family are for; some of you reading this might be nodding your head right now, “Yeah, I remember Nye came to me for advice.” Okay, you can stop smiling now. Did I sound stupid to any of you?, probably not, I like to know what my options are before making a decision; there might be a better solution out there that I’ve not thought of, but that’s just me. For some, this might not be a good idea, and if you’ve too much pride, then try to look at the problem from a different perspective, the solution might be right in front of you, it’s just not in black and white.
There is a story that I like to share, I read this a while back and can’t recall if it’s from a magazine or a book, but one thing for certain is that it was written in Thai language. I like this story because things might not appear as is, solution might not be in black or white, and it’s crucial to be able to think on your feet.
This is written by Robert Alan Black, Ph.D, the term using for creative thinkers are Crayon Breakers. There are 32 human traits, be honest with yourself and only check the ones apply to you. The more you check off, the more creative you are as a person.
Would you like to play?
Are You a Crayon BREAKER?
1. sensitive
2. not motivated by money
3. sense of destiny
4. adaptable
5. tolerant of ambiguity
6. observant
7. perceive world differently
8. see possibilities
9. question asker
10. can synthesize correctly often intuitively
11. able to fantasize
12. flexible
13. fluent
14. imaginative
15. intuitive
16. original
17. ingenious
18. energetic
19. sense of humor
20. self-actualizing
21. self-disciplined
22. self-knowledgeable
23. specific interests
24. divergent thinker
25. curious
26. open-ended
27. independent
28. severely critical
29. non-conforming
30. confident
31. risk taker
32. persistent
How many of the traits did you first mark as fitting you?
Would you be shy to share your answer? I can honestly say that most apply to me except for #31 risk taker, I have to admit that I like to play it safe. What about you? Please leave your answer here.
I’m sure we all heard the term ‘working hard or working smart’. I use to think that the only way that you’re going to get anywhere in life is to work hard at it, I’m not so sure anymore. In this world, there’re people that work very little but make a lot of money, and there’re many people that work a lot, but make very little money; I’m sure we all want to be in the first category that work very little but make a lot…then again it’s easier said than done.
I’m not sure which category I belong to, if you’d ask, I’d say the later one, but at the same time like to think that I belong in the first category, if not now, maybe someday. If you ask me, what’s my job title? I’d say I’m the clean up crew at my work, a miscellaneous person because I’ve to do things that people can’t do (sometimes I fell like they don’t want to do); lately I’ve been asking myself, it is worth it? Is it worth my time because here I’ve to do their work, while they do other stuff that I won’t go into detail. Let us just say that many times I’m working hard, while others are working smart by delegating their work that they couldn’t do to me; sometimes-knowing more is not always a good thing.
Another thing is blogging, I blog because I love to write and not even thinking about putting Ads on my blog, which I’ve had offered but I’ve my mind set that I’ll never put Ads on my blog (sounds stupid, but that’s my philosophy). I’ve noticed lately that there are many blogs ( scraper sites) that set up with many Ads and linking to many of my posts that might have the key words of ‘Laos, Thai, 100 Vanh, Vietnamese family, Hmong, Thai tattoo, Ghost, Fashion…etc’ (Darly sites are exception that I’m happy for her to link, and also any bloggers such as myself). The owners of these blogs (scraper sites) don’t have to do any writing, just searching, obviously, I’m the one that have to work hard, but they’re working smart by taking my work, and also collecting Ads revenue for every hit that they get. Is that fair? It’s like farming on someone’s back which these (scraper sites) are set up solely for the purpose of earning revenue through advertising. I guess it’s somewhat annoying to me, but not enough for me to do something about it, if you’ve noticed, I’ve (cc) Creative Commons, which is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike, which I want to share my work with others. Did these blogs (scraper sites) violate my license, probably because they’re generating revenue from it, but not totally, because they’re linking back to my blog, but bottom line, I’m working hard, and they’re working smart.
On a day-to-day basis, we all express ourselves in different way. For some of us that decide to write poems, books, articles, blogs, form Lao forums, Lao Radios, Lao TVs, become artists, or publish Lao magazines, whether it’s hard copy or on-line, we all want our voice to be heard. Some might feel that they are only doing it as a hobby, but deep down inside, we all want to voice our opinions, in a fashion that best suits us. We are unique individuals, but what we all have in common is that we have the same root, we are from Laos, and we are Laotian. I am proud of my heritage, of who I am, and have so much to tell and the internet has made that possible for most of us, an instant publishing at the click of a button, and we have voiced our opinions. I think writing is a powerful tool, we can create, can communicate, can make progress, but if use in the wrong way it can delay progress, can destroy images of our people, our country, and of someone (innocent) that might have tried to create a name for themselves for many years. Therefore, when we write, we need to think of other people’s feelings as well, not just venting out our angers.
Is there such thing as ‘True, Real, Authentic, Original, Certified’, I’m thinking not. We assume all things; the only certain thing in life is the uncertainty. The words ‘True or Real’ only creates a ‘want’, we all want something that is real or true because we feel confident that we are getting the best, of course, we only deserve the best.
One of my neighbors is an American lady; we started talking about income tax one day last week, and she told me that she is hiring a certified public accountant to do her income tax for her. She seems so proud that this person is ‘certified’; I guess she felt that a ‘certified’ person must be good, only the best! Well, as for me, I’m doing my own tax return; I think I can do as good of a job as that ‘certified’ person that my neighbor is hiring, and my is ‘free’, that’s even better!
There are so many restaurants out there, but did you ever pick one out because of the word ‘Authentic’? For most of us, that word means that we are getting the real McCoy, why settle for anything less? Little do we know, most ‘Authentic Restaurants or Cuisines’ are not run by the native of that country. For instance, we have a Japanese restaurant that’s operated by a Vietnamese person, a Thai restaurant that’s operated by a Lao family, and a Chinese restaurant that’s operated by a Hmong person, but the word ‘Authentic’ gives us the feeling that we are eating the real authentic food, prepared by the people from that region.
Just reading the title sounds like someone real old that just gives up hope, or those that are defeated in the game of life, defeated in the game of love, but I think deep down inside, defeat is not a good word to use, more like change. The world revolves around, things are changing constantly, we can’t expect things to be the same, we have to change with the world, and change with society, change is good.
For those that have a steady income, are paid on a weekly/bi-weekly/monthly basis, we feel confident that we will always be paid. Then those that own a business, either in manufacturing, restaurant, or retail, some days things might seem to be going pretty good, money keeps pouring in, and other days, it’s so little that it might not even cover the basic cost, pretty scary. What about those that have lots of money in the bank just to earn interest, at one time the interest income might be growing steady, but at certain time, it’s very little. For those that have a job, sometimes we feel like we just can’t wait for the weekends, holidays, or vacations, and what about ‘TGIF’. Yet it’s depressing if we don’t have a job, can’t wait to find that job to go to, the job that we love. Some people are fortunate than others, some might find something that they love to do, even if they aren’t paid. For others, they might work at a job that they absolutely hate, just to get money. If what I’ve just mentioned is confusing, sounds more like I’m just ranting, then just look around you, things are constantly changing, nothing stays the same.
I found an interesting article in Kullastree Magazine, written by Thienchai Easondath in Thai language, which gives people an odd reason why people should not commit suicide. Personally, I think that there’s always an answer to a problem, you just have to take a step back to be able to see it. I think that committing suicide should not be an answer to any problem, if anything it only creates more problems for those that are still living. Read on to see what this article has to say about why people should not commit suicide.
In modern Thai society, the majority of people think that they only live in this life time, and only live for a few people around them, if life gets tough, some might think that committing suicide is an easy way out, put an end to all problems. There are many reasons why modern people commit suicide, such as they think that they are not important to anyone, no significant impact if they are no longer in this world, and there’s no reason why they have to continue with their suffering. Another twisted reason is revenge, hurt or killed themselves because they are the love of the person that they are revenging. This one is classic among Japanese fighters, committing suicide to restore their pride, especially if they lost in a battle, it is an honorable thing to do. For whatever reason, people will try to justify why it’s okay for them to commit suicide, and their reasoning might varies and seems like a good idea at the time.
Thai and Lao way of life and traditional have a strong belief why a person should not commit suicide. From a religious point of view, ‘committing suicide is a sin’, which is a way to prevent people from taking their own life. From the perspective of those that don’t have much personal problem, they think that those that kill themselves only think in short term, Thai and Lao traditions believe that life is longer than the time we are here on earth, there’s the past life, the present life, and the future life, therefore it’s a long journey that have no ending. Worst, our religion, Buddhism also stress that committing suicide is a sin (gum), therefore every life you will end up committing suicide and the vicious cycle will never end, until you come to realization and able to pass that past sin (gum gao).
Have you ever ask yourself why certain people are considered good and certain are bad? What do you use to measure good or bad people? Most Laotian that I know, even my own sisters seem to think that if you are rich, successful, and educated then you are a good person, someone to look up to with admiration. Yet, we have those that take advantage of us, those selfish people are considered bad people in our eyes, even though they might be successful, well educated. Most of us don’t think twice about the average Jane or Joe, why is that so? Because they are not rich, educated, successful, and people don’t look up to them with admiration, therefore, they are not a ‘good’ person and some might not want to be associated with them. I used to think that this way of thinking is abnormal, a bit narrow minded, how can someone divided people into only 2 groups, good and bad therefore create hatred among themselves. I think the majority of people seem to think this way, therefore that’s the norm; which reflects back on my part that I might be the abnormal one that don’t think like the norm.
If you like something, you would consider it a good thing, and the right thing to do, and if you don’t like something, then it’s automatically a bad thing. If that’s the case, then there’s plenty of room to make judgment error because not everything that you like might be good, nor everything that you hate might be bad. Sometimes it’s not a good idea to let our like or dislikes to determine good or bad, and to judge people according to what we like or dislike.
I normally read almost everyday, whether it’s current events, magazine articles, or books so I don’t know what it feels like not being able to read for a long period. For most of us, that like to go on-line everyday, it would feel somewhat strange not to be able to. The last couple of weeks that I wasn’t able to go on-line on a regular basis, I felt like I missed out tremendously on the current events. I think if you’ve gone on-line for a long period of time, it can be very additive but for some that have never gone on-line before, I often wonder if they feel like they are missing out on what the world wide web has to offer. Of course, television is a good substitution for PC.
Have you ever want to be a kid again? Actually we all can if we want to and it’s not that hard to do at all. Many psychologists called this Play Therapy, and this will help you control your emotion better. It also helps you to become more creative and more imaginative. Us adult tend to be too serious about everything, and if we can think like little kid, it will be great. I remember when I was little, I used to think that the sky is the limit, and anything is possible. This way of thinking also alleviates stress. If you don’t know what to play, I have some suggestions for you and if you can’t remember the rules, then just ask a kid, he/she can help you out.
Nobody knows for certain why we dream. Some psychologists have theories propose that dreams are the body’s way of ‘rebooting’ the brain (sounds and works like a computer.) Dreams dispose of memories that would otherwise clutter the mind with unnecessary remembered experiences. In particular, they enable the emotions to become balance. Dreams get rid of ‘garbage’ in our brain, and allow the brain’s complex chemistry to stabilize. According to this viewpoint, without dreams we would simply overheat.
Doesn’t matter how different we are, what genders, religions or races, what we all have in common are dreams. We all dreams approximately 4 to 5 times a night, each time is a bit longer. Most of us dream every 90 minutes, and the longest dream lasting 30 to 45 minutes, many occur in the morning. If we were awakening during our REM (Rapid eye movements) sleep, we would recall our dreams. If we are awaken during our non-REM sleep, we would less likely to recall our dreams, this may account for why many people believe that they never dream. The truth is, we all dream every night but most of us forget we were dreaming.
I wrote this a while back but never have the opportunity to share with most people. I think it’s somewhat of a healthy way to look at life and living. For me, sometimes it’s easier said than done, but I think some of you might like it.
If you ask this question in a forum or a chat room, ‘who or what control our destiny.’ Try it and you’ll see that the answers varies, everyone will have their own answer, and I don’t think there are any right or wrong answers because we all think differently. Some might say ‘destiny, horoscope, Borp (past sin), Boun (good sin), environment, economy, government, money, love, encouragement, family, job, and yourself.’
Personally I think we control our own destiny because everyday, we have to make decision on our daily lives such as ‘if you like this, if you want to do this’, which ultimately we have to make that decision ourselves. I think there are many things that go into our decision making process, whether it’s our thinking, life experiences, emotional, reasoning, or hope (whether intentional or unintentional.)
The important thing about decision-making process is that after you make that decision, you either do or don’t do what you’ve decided. There’s a simple rule that I usually follow, which is if I’m doing something good and it’s a benefit to me and others, then its okay to do it repeatedly. Nevertheless, if it’s something that I did and nothing good comes out from it, then I stopped at what I’m doing, it’s pointless, why waste my time and energy. Bottom line, I’m responsible for my own action, I’ve seen all the time where people would decide to do something and when things don’t go as plan, then blame others for it. If you’ve decided to do something and better things come along, it’s okay to change your mind and go with something better. You have the right to change your mind as long as it doesn’t hurt others.
I personally think that people that have positive outlook in life are very attractive. If you think positive, you’ll be much happier and beauty comes from within, whether it’s your smile, your happiness, people can sense that in your writing/posting or even on your telephone conversation. I like this article because most of us hate to get up in the morning to go to work. I’ve been in this situation many times, especially if it rains, wouldn’t it be nice to sleep in that day. This article might make you think differently about your job. This is from Kullastree Magazine, by Manop Phrapasanonh, written in Thai language, translated by Ginger.
Work is something that most of us have to do everyday. People that have a job to go to are very lucky, even if you don’t feel lucky at the moment. Those that don’t want to work, or are lazy to work are not lucky because work gives you money, which everyone needs money to survive. An unpleasant fact, most of us need to work, whether our job is a CEO of a big corporation or a bag boy in a supermarket, it’s a job that we make a living and we should be proud that at least we have a job to go to.
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